Babylon Bee: Top-Secret List Of Biden's Cabinet Picks

This is a satire piece, but might not actually be too far from the truth.

Biden insiders have contacted the Babylon Bee to reveal some of his top cabinet picks. Wow! They must really like us. Take a look at the list below for a revealing look at the next administration.

AOC - Secretary of Math

Jeb Bush - Secretary of Energy

Hunter Biden - Secretary of Treasury

Pete Buttigieg - Secretary of Gay Stuff

Nikole Hannah-Jones - Secretary of Education

Ibram X. Kendi - Secretary of Re-Segregation

Rachael Maddow - Secretary of Defense

CNN President Jeff Zucker - Secretary of Ending The Pandemic

Keith Olbermann - Secretary of Mental Health

Chinese President Xi Jinping - U.S. Trade Representative

Jane Fonda - Secretary of Veterans Affairs

Petro Poroshenko - Secretary of... not sure yet but we'll get him in somewhere

Don Lemon - Director of National Intelligence

Any female of color - Secretary of Diversity

Bernie Sanders - Secretary of Labor

Carole Baskin - Secretary of Health and Human Services

Elizabeth Warren - Director of Bureau of Indian Affairs, duh

Gavin Newsom - Secretary of Transportation

Trump - Secretary of Nicknaming Stuff

Bob Brown - Secretary of White House Handicap Accessibility

Dale Smith - Secretary of White House Maintenance and Telling the President Whatever Those Flyover State People Are Up To

Amber Carter, R.N. - Secretary of Reminding Biden What His Name Is

Chef Gordon Ramsay - Secretary of Crushing Up Meds Into Biden's Applesauce

This list, according to experts, is entirely plausible. We hope you've enjoyed this super exclusive peek into Joe Biden's administration!